Michele Bacon
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Unsolicited Advice: Logic

8/17/2015

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When your child wishes for something exciting but impossible, the proper response is, "That would be cool!"

Learn from my experience: any logical response will go up in flames.

To be fair, this was my most logical child. My dear 2010 said, "I wish tomorrow were my birthday."

First off, kudos to my four-year-old for using the conditional sense. Second, I tried to logic her out of it. It did not go well.

"It wouldn't really be fair if you had two birthdays, would it?" See what I did? I appealed to her sense of fairness and love for her sisters.
Irritated, she explained that didn't want two, she just wanted hers to be tomorrow. 

I tried more logic.
"But if tomorrow were your birthday, my Love, you would be devastated when your actual birthday rolled around and it wasn't your birthday anymore."
My angry girl explained that she wanted to skip right to her birthday.

More logic.
"You know, Love, if we skipped right to your birthday, we would SKIP your grandmother's birthday, and Genevieve's and Felix's, and Suzy Lou's, too."
She knew, but she wanted cake and presents.

I sensed whining on the horizon, but I had her!
"Love, we're not ready for your party. I haven't baked a cake or bought any presents. There are no decorations or anything."
Tears. I had made her cry. She knew, but it would be cool if her birthday were tomorrow.

I finally got it. 
"You're right, 2010! That would be cool!"

And off she went to play, blissed out with her cool idea.
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    I blog rarely, because I'm busy writing books. When I do blog, I focus on writing, friendship, family, and books. Because my family's best nicknames are private, I use their birth years for shorthand:
    1977: my partner
    2008: my first daughter
    2010: daughter #2

    2013: the final daught

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